Wednesday, November 30, 2011

32 Weeks...

What a huge milestone! 32 weeks down and only two short weeks to go. I remember when 24 was our goal and then 28, then 30 and here we are at 32 weeks. For some reason this was the number I was waiting for, the number where I could breathe a little easier. Like I do every Wednesday, I read the 10 different books and 5 different apps I have on my phone regarding what's happening with the girls' this week.

According to most they should be anywhere from 3.75 to 4 pounds and about 16 inches long. 32 inches of baby in me?! Wow. We won't have our next growth ultrasound for a week, but we are very anxious and curious to see how much they weigh. We are hoping they have at least hit the 4 lb mark, that would be great progress. They are also shedding the lanugo that has been on their little bodies and they are growing eyelashes, eyebrows and hair!

I was hoping when I got pregnant for the first time that I wouldn't be one of those women that "waddle." Well, that didn't happen. I didn't get too big with Keller but I still had a slight waddle. With Presley I was a little bigger and the waddle returned. But here we are at 32 weeks with a uterus measuring 45 weeks plus so the waddle is not only there, but would make anyone close to me scared for their life. As many woman know pregnancy hormones relax your joints and make you move differently. Your center of gravity is dramatically different. My family often wonders how I don't tip over when I stand up!

So with my muscles stretching and becoming more flexible, I thought it was appropriate that I learned that this week the girls' muscles are going through a growth spurt. And most of the weight they are putting on is largely due to an increase in muscle tissue. I'm glad my girls are putting on muscle and gaining strength because I feel like I have none! Getting out of bed takes all the energy I have. Thankfully I don't have to walk much (I'm not allowed to anyway) So since I don't have a lot of strength right now, what a perfect time it is to rely on God. This week and the weeks to come I will praying for a generous outpouring of His strength, because if these baby girls are going to come into the world, I'm going to need a lot of it! This morning I started looking up verses regarding strength. Praise God the bible is full of verses that speak of God's strength being sufficient when we find ourselves weak.

I am so thankful our sweet girls' are getting stronger with each passing day. We want our children to be strong- not just physically, but emotionally, mentally and spiritually. We pray that God will give them strength to always stand up for what is right. I think especially of their teenage years when negative peer pressure will be a real and fighting force. God, help them to stand firm in You! Give them the strength to resist any temptation that goes against your Word. Help them to stand strong in the face of adversity. Give them the confidence that they can do anything that you ask them to do. Help Tyler and I to build a foundation of truth into their lives at a young age, so they will have the tools they need to be strong.

"The Lord gives strength to His people; the Lord blesses His people with peace." Psalm 29:11

Monday, November 28, 2011

Girls, Girls, Girls...

At times I get really bothered by facebook. It's really my own fault. I don't have to click on the "accept friend request" button but about 95% of the time I do. Unlike Tyler who likes to "make them wait it out." But lately I'm bothered at certain posts. Ones I can't ignore. Ones I should comment on but I don't. I get that facebook is a social networking site and you are pretty much free to put on there whatever you desire. But the status updates that get me are the ones from girls ranging in age from 16-19. Some are shocking, some are disgusting and some are downright cruel. Just the other day Tyler and I were saying how fortunate we were that facebook didn't exist when we were in high school. I think facebook makes going to junior/high school ten times harder. All it takes is one post and some one's life can be turned upside down. I can't stand cattiness. I can't stand when girls' can't be happy for other girls. I can't stand when a high school girl posts about a girl who is the very same class as her. Just who do you think you are? Can you tell I'm irritated? Why is so hard for us as young women to accept other young women. It really baffles me. Why can't we cheer on our fellow woman and rejoice with her when she triumphs and encourage her when she fails. What do we gain by being so ugly? In my experience girls that talk this way about others girls are unhappy with themselves. They are so sad and so lost that the only cure for the sickness is to make others feel as bad as they do. It breaks my heart for them. Other posts that make me look twice and the ones that involve their boyfriends. At times my mouth is literally left hanging open at the things I read. When you are 19 years old and your boyfriend is bringing you breakfast in bed, something is wrong people! IT'S WRONG.

In no way, shape or form do I think I'm perfect. I've made plenty of mistakes. Anyone that knows 3 things about me would know that I was pregnant with Keller when Tyler and I get married. We didn't do things in the right order and that's something we aren't proud of. Would we change the outcome, absolutely not, Keller was the greatest thing to ever happen to us. But would we have saved the heartache that came with having a baby before marriage. Absolutely. We were not honoring God with our choices back then, which makes it all the more important that our children do. It has really hit home with us lately now that we will have three daughters. It terrifies us to think about the world that they will grow up in. That's why we have to constantly be in prayer for our children, even before they are born. We don't want them to see sex as something casual and fleeting, but as an amazing gift that God has given them to cultivate with their husband and wife. Our prayer is that our daughters and our son will grow up to be completely confident in his or her sexual identity. We pray that Keller embraces his masculinity and seeks to become a strong, yet gentle man who brings honor and glory to his Savior. We pray our girls rejoice in their womanhood and see it not as a burden or weakness, but as a blessing and a joy. Most importantly we pray that we will never stereotype them or put them in a
box, but lovingly encourage them to be exactly who God wants them to be.

Today, I'm going to pray for these girls I have noticed on facebook. Some are friends of friends while others are much closer. I wish I could tell them they are so much more beautiful than the ugly things that come out of their mouths. I wish they could know about the complete peace that comes in having an identity in Jesus rather than things of this world. I wish they could see how precious they are and that God has an incredible plan for their lives if they would just trust Him. So, why can't I tell them these things? Perhaps that's where my insecurities come in. It's much easier to "hide" behind a computer and say these things rather than call someone out online. So for now I will pray for these girls whom I sure have really sweet hearts and good intentions but just need a little guidance. I urge you to encourage and love on someone today who might really need it. You don't have to come across as judgy or "be all up in there face" about it. Speak kindly and let them know you love them. Be on their side. Because after all, us girls have to stick together.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Fighting a harder battle

It's no surprise that my pregnancy has been pretty eventful to say the least. In fact, as I sit here from a hospital bed, I look back on how far we have come. Call me crazy but I am so grateful to be in this very place. Because being here means I'm still carrying my girls and they are still growing and doing all the things they should. You will never know how much all the cards, calls, texts, and emails have meant to my family during this time. But I don't want to focus on me and my situation any more. Don't get me wrong, please continue to pray for my girls', Tyler, Keller, Presley and those that unselfishly take care of them in my absence. This post is more about bringing awarenss to others and their situations. I love that I can enoucrage others, and I so appreciate when others tell me how positive my outlook is. Everyday when we wake up we have to choose to be joyful or not. Don't make excuses of why your day is going to be horrible, just choose to be joyful. So, am I always joyful and positive? Absolutely not, I just have to choose to be those things.

In all reality my situation is pretty great considering. Yes, it really stinks to be in a hosital room 24 hours a day, but the greatest thing about it is that we get something amazing at the end. My condition is not terminal, I am not dying. I get to leave her and have two more precious babies, God willing. For others, the outcome will be drastically different.

Someone whom I adore called me ealier today and asked if I would pray for a woman who was going through some major stuff. And while it is not my place to share her story, trust me when I say, it's heavy. But here's what got me, this woman who was going through all these horriffic things asked about me. Me. Despite this dark place she was in, she thought about me and my girls and wanted me to know that she thought about us everyday. I was humbled. It goes to show you that someone is always fighting a harder battle. Always. We complain about how crowded the grocery store is, how our kids are driving us crazy, how the drive thru was too slow etc. I want to challenge you to stop and think before you complain. If the grocery store is too crowded think about those who would love to be able to go the store and buy groceries but aren't able to. For everytime you say your kids are driving you crazy think about a woman who longs for a baby of her own. Someone is always fighting a harder battle. So for today and everday, have an attitude of gratitude and choose joy.

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NIV)